everytime I start to stray, God calls me back. I tend to find myself acting like a square block trying to fit in a circle hole. I don't know why...but after a while I always try finding different ways and places to fit in. I tend to try and fill the void of not having my boyfriend in my life anymore with things that I think will make it better instead of putting God at the center. It is almost like I know what I am supposed to do, but I have to mess up so many times before I will actually understand. Ha.

i hadn't made time for God the past week, and I was just starting to feel worn down and out come church on Sunday....so I decided today to start reading Red Moon Rising again, and already I feel a million times better. It is amazing how just a little bit of God's goodness can bring unending love and joy and peace and patience. I don't get it, nor do I think I ever will, but thank God it happens.

This was kinda a short and pointless post, but I just needed to get some thoughts out.