i think i could probably yell as loud as i can and it will always seem as if i am yelling at a deaf person. it's like i knock and no one is home because someone is in love. at least you say its love.

only 6 months ago you called me your best friend, but now you allow her to tell you who you are and are not allowed to talk to. have you lost all respect for me and how i was more than a good friend to you? have you lost all respect for yourself? i guess i just dont get it. actually, i do...ive been there. i know what its like to be restricted from some of your bestfriends because your man/woman says you can't talk to them anymore. let me tell you something....YOU ARE IN AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP!

so you continue to stay in the relationship and ignore everything i say. you slowly stop talking to me, and i dont even think you understand how much it is breaking me down. im not trying to be vain and make it seem like im the only thing that matters, but i don't know how much longer i can put up with this.


so i wrote all above about 2 or so days ago....just let it sit on my computer, and this is now how i feel....


i found out A LOT last night. a lot i didnt expect and just a lot in general. but surprisingly enough, im not mad. im actually quite happy. i realized how immature i had been and i have realized its not about how he is affecting me. its not about how he is hurting me, because i am human and to be frank I probably deserve it. so ya.
now i will just be love, and love alone. because through love comes everything else. it just happens that way. and thank God it does.